Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Snow photos

I almost forgot to post a link to the photos from our trip up to the snow.

This entry is still sore from the sledding.

Saturday, December 23, 2006

My ass hurts (AKA I think I bruised coccyx)

Earlier today I went up into the San Bernardino mountains with Rece and Christine. This was a day of fun that I wanted Rece to experience, since he hasn't ever played in real snow before. We had tried to do so earlier in 2006, but the snow had turned into hardened ice. Today's snow was near perfect: powdery, with some patches of snowball quality material. It wasn't good for snow angels or snowmen, though (just to be clear). I wonder which of the more than 200 words the Inuits use for snow they'd call it.

We started off by going to Cedar Pines Park so I could show Christine the Rock Pile. Just before we reached it, we encountered two coyotes. We didn't have enough time to pull out the cameras before they took off. They were very pretty in their winter coats.

After that, we went up to Twin Peaks for some sledding (saucering?) at a spot I knew the locals went. There were just a few kids there at the time, which was nice. The area had been used quite a bit in the days before, which made for some well-packed snow. We had 3 different types of sleds: 2 saucer-type, and one "Super Tube".

I was the first to go and I chose the more traditional-looking saucer. My weight, the smoothness of the saucer, and the well-packed snow made for a very fast run. The white of the snow made it difficult to see any change in the slope from the top of the hill, but it turned out that there was enough of a bump at the bottom to give me quite a jolt. I found myself getting my ass slammed down onto the saucer, as I was tilted backwards, and I heard (and felt) a pop from my tail bone. It didn't feel quite right at the time, and has felt rather sore since it happened. I'm hoping that it's just a bruise.

Rece was a bit hesitant about sledding, which isn't unusual for him. He tends to be a bit of a chicken when it comes to traveling fast (roller coasters and the likes). After some cheering on, he made his run and didn't seem too bad off. He ended up making quite a few runs after we discovered a slope off to the side that wasn't so steep.

Christine went on two runs, herself. Her first run was on one of the saucer-like sleds -- one with more padding than the one I used. She also hit rather hard at the bottom and tweaked her back a bit. She (wisely) opted to use the inflatable "Super Tube" on her second run and ended up having a blow-out -- the tube ripped and deflated just as she got to the bottom (and into a ditch). Looks like it wasn't so "Super" after all.

After sledding we checked out the baseball field at a park across the street. It was an open field of snow and we had ourselves a snowball fight. We also met a nice fellow with a very cool dog. We all took turns throwing the dog's ball for her to retrieve.

The physical activity eventually began to take it's toll on us and we were getting hungry. So we said goodbye to the guy and his dog and went off to check on a geocache I have hidden up there. Seeing that it was in good condition, we continued on to Lake Arrowhead for a bite to eat and to walk around the shops.

Christine and Rece found some good deals on last-minute Christmas gifts and with her back aching, and my ass throbbing (that didn't sound quite right), we decided to call it a day and made our way back home.

Going back over today's adventure, I can't help but smile. This was definitely a good day!

This entry is trying to sit in a comfortable position.

Monday, December 18, 2006

Wet and angry pussy

A couple of methods for washing your kitty. What? What were you thinking this post was about?!

First Method

1. Thoroughly clean the toilet.
2. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water, and have both lids lifted.
3. Obtain the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.
4. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids (you may need to stand on the lid so that he cannot escape).
CAUTION: Do not get any part of your body too close to the edge, as his paws will be reaching out for any
purchase they can find.
5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a 'power wash and rinse' which I have found to be quite effective.
6. Have someone open the door to the outside and ensure that there are no people between the toilet and the outside door.
7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.
8. The now-clean cat will rocket out of the toilet, and run outside where he will dry himself.



Second Method

1. Know that although the kitty cat has the advantage of quickness and lack of concern for human life, you have the advantage of strength. Capitalize on that advantage by selecting the battlefield. Don't try to bathe him in an open area where he can force you to chase him. Pick a very small bathroom. If your bathroom is more than four feet square, we recommend that you get in the tub with the cat and close the sliding-glass doors as if you were about to take a shower. (A simple shower curtain will not do. A berserk cat can shred a three-ply rubber shower curtain quicker than a politician can shift positions.)

2. Know that a cat has claws and will not hesitate to remove all the skin from your body. Your advantage here is that you are smart and know how to dress to protect yourself. We recommend canvas overalls tucked into high-top construction boots, a pair of steel-mesh gloves, an army helmet, a hockey face-mask, and a long-sleeved flak jacket.

3. Use the element of surprise. Pick up your cat nonchalantly, as if to simply carry him to his supper dish. (Cats will not usually notice your strange attire. They have little or no interest in fashion as a rule.)

4. Once you are inside the bathroom, speed is essential to survival. In a single liquid motion, shut the bathroom door, step into the tub enclosure, slide the glass door shut, dip the cat in the water and squirt him with shampoo. You have now begun one of the wildest 45 seconds of your life.

5. Cats have no handles. Add the fact that he now has soapy fur, and the problem is radically compounded. Do not expect to hold on to him for more than two or three seconds at a time. When you have him, however, you must remember to give him another squirt of shampoo and rub like crazy. He'll then spring free and fall back into the water, thereby rinsing himself off. (The national record for cats is three latherings, so don't expect too much.)

6. Next, the cat must be dried. Novice cat bathers always assume this part will be the most difficult, for humans generally are worn out at this point and the cat is just getting really determined. In fact, the drying is simple compared with what you have just been through. That's because by now the cat is semi-permanently affixed to your right leg.

7. You simply pop the drain plug with your foot, reach for your towel and wait. (Occasionally, however, the cat will end up clinging to the top of your army helmet. If this happens, the best thing you can do is to shake him loose and to encourage him toward your leg.) After all the water is drained from the tub, it is a simple matter to just reach down and dry the cat.

In a few days the cat will relax enough to be removed from your leg. He will usually have nothing to say for about three weeks and will spend a lot of time sitting with his back to you. He might even become psychoceramic and develop the fixed stare of a plaster figurine.

You will be tempted to assume he is angry. This isn't usually the case. As a rule he is simply plotting ways to get through your defenses and injure you for life the next time you decide to give him a bath. But at least now he smells a lot better.

- Stolen from a craigslist post (which seems to have been stolen from someplace else)

This entry is still snickering about the title of this post.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

The diamond biz

I found this excellent article about how messed up the diamond market is and how essentially it's all just a fabricated and artificially controlled scam. Wake up people!

This entry doesn't like materialism, especially when
it stems from an artificially created market.

Monday, December 11, 2006

More Christmas Mash-ups!

Okay, I couldn't help it. Here's a list of some seriously messed up re-dubs of home holiday classics.

Enjoy!

This entry probably won't have any friends after today's posts.

Merry Christmas, Charlie Brown - NOT!

This is blasphemous and looney - but my, oh my, is it funny!

Merry Christmas, indeed!

This entry can already feel the hot coals of hell
licking at his feet for posting this one!

Friday, December 08, 2006

I Hate Drake

Okay, maybe I don't hate him personally, but this guy sure did when he was a kid. I found this video while reading through my RSS feeds (Boing Boing) and got a good laugh out of it. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did...

Oh, and as a warning, there's language that might be considered offensive to some people (yeah, you know who you are, fuckers) ... so just be careful who's within ear shot.

This entry was written while under the influence of cold medicine.

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Route 66 & Calico Ghost Town

This weekend was a lot of fun. Christine turned ... um ... 33 ... [ahem] this year and to celebrate we decided to take a road trip to Calico Ghost Town via Route 66.

The one bummer about the weekend was that Rece has been screwing up BIG TIME in school, which meant that he had been grounded, thus missing out on this adventure. Hopefully this helps him learn a valuable lesson.

So the three of us (Sam, Christine, & Gabe) hopped in my car and departed for San Bernardino where we'd connect with Route 66 at the original location of McDonald's. From there we drove up the historic highway, geocaching along the way. Once we got through Victorville, we got back on the I-15 and drove in to Barstow, where we had made plans to stay for the night.

Being winter, it gets dark quite early. We weren't anywhere near tired yet and were itching for something to do. On our way to the motel from dinner we noticed a drive-in theater, so we hooked up the laptop I brought along and looked up the movie times (love free wireless!). It worked out that we had plenty of time to get there in time to watch Flushed Away, so we made our way there, being sure to check out the (not so) happening main strip of Barstow. The bar at the restaurant connected to our motel was apparently the hot-spot that night.

I parked the car with the back facing the screen and all three of us packed into the cargo area (with the seats folded forward) and wrapped ourselves in bedding borrowed from our motel room. It was quite chilly (I was fine, but the girls were "freezing") and we laughed at the ridiculousness of the entire ordeal. The movie was entertaining and Sam got to experience her first drive-in movie.

We were up bright and early Sunday morning and enjoyed a tasty (hot) breakfast at the restaurant connected to the motel. After breakfast we set out towards Calico Ghost Town. Along the way we came across the location of the first Del Taco and we stopped to take some pictures. The following 45 minutes were spent driving my Ford Taurus wagon around Dukes of Hazard style in pursuit of a cache. Try as we might, we just couldn't find the right road to get there and none of these dirt roads showed up in Microsoft Streets & Trips (to no surprise). There were quite a few homes with many (inoperable) vehicles in the yard, our car was chased by a pair of large dogs, and I half expected for somebody to walk out of their front door carrying a shotgun -- yes, it was that bad. We never did find the cache, but despite all this laughter was a-plenty within our group; nothing seemed to dampen our spirits this weekend. Having given up on the cache, we drove on to Calico Ghost Town.

Now it had been a good 20 years since I had last visited the place, and it looked quite different than I remember. For a ghost town, it sure looked a lot more lively than before. Seems the place has become more of a tourist trap than an historic landmark. With this in mind, I just went on enjoying it for what it was and had a lot of fun learning about the real history of the place and checking out the mines. It wasn't too difficult to get a mental image of what it must have been like to have had lived here when it was all a bustle with over 3000 residents in its heyday. Once we'd had our fill of history and cheesy gun-fighting scenes (the one we watched was very bad), we stopped by the Calico Cemetery to seek out information needed for a geocache.

Departing Calico, we picked up a couple more easy caches and pointed the Taurus in the direction of a challenge: the BLACK BOX mystery cache series. This is a cache that requires one to find 3 other caches, each containing a piece to a puzzle that needed to be solved in order to be able to find the 4th, and final cache. I'm horrible with puzzle-style caches, but Christine loves them and seems to have a head for the stuff, so I was happy to join her on this one. The easier way to get to this cache was to find an access road that would get you part-way to the top, but after looking for 30 minutes and not locating it, we opted to park at the closest spot available and just billy goat it up to the top. No problem! It was only .37 miles from the car, yet took us a good 30 minutes to scramble up a loose, rocky, and steep slope to the upper access road. We swore quite a bit, between laughing, cursing the cache owner for clearly mis-labeling the terrain rating on this one. We found the cache, collected our first piece to the puzzle, then made our way back down. Round-trip this cache took over an hour to find once we left the car and it was then beginning to get dark. The other caches of this series, we decided, would have to wait for another day.

Back on the road, we made our way over to Route 66 to drive the portion between Barstow & Victorville (that we had skipped over the night before). We found one more cache along the way. Christine had wanted to go to the Mad Greek in Baker, but after explaining that it was near Death Valley and about an hour in the opposite direction of home, she resigned to skipping it. While driving, my memory sparked, sputtered, caught fire, caused a lot of smoke, and then revealed that it knew of a Mad Greek location in Corona. We pulled off the road so I could consult the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy (Microsoft Streets & Trips) and was pleased to discover that Alzheimer's hadn't begun to settle in and that there was in fact a Mad Greek in Corona, but he's apparently undergoing psycho-therapy and doing quite well as of late. We dropped in to discover that madness wasn't too far off: they were out of gyros -- a Greek restaurant out of gyros. Yes, we gawked. Yes, we stared incredulously. No, we didn't go mad ... nor did we go Greek; we went Mexican ... Miguel's Mexican restaurant, to be exact.

With full tummies we made our way home, our minds also full with pleasant memories of all the fun we had over the weekend.

We took over 200 pictures, but I managed to prune the total down to 56 of them and put them up on my Flickr account. You can check them out here.

This entry is happy that it doesn't live in, or anywhere near
Yermo, California -- despite the original Del Taco.